Author: vmdev

Your credit score is a vital financial tool that plays a significant role in your life. It influences your ability to secure loans, credit cards, and favorable interest rates. Whether you’re planning to buy a home, start a business, or simply want to have better financial opportunities, improving your credit score is a smart move. In this blog post, we’ll delve into actionable steps you can take to boost your credit score and pave the way for a brighter financial future.

 

Establishing Credit

If you have no credit history and are trying to establish credit, you may find the process quite frustrating. Check out options like petalcard.com where you can get approved for credit without any history using alternative methods like income, fixed expenses, and assets.

Be sure to check out experian.com. This credit bureau will show everything that is affecting your credit score and how to improve it. They have a feature called Experian Boost that will pull in your bank accounts or credit cards and find any bills that could be reported to the credit bureau. If they are not currently being reported, Experian will report them for you in an effort to provide you with credit history.

Understanding Your Credit Score

Before diving into the strategies to improve your credit score, it’s essential to understand what it is and how it’s calculated. A credit score is a number which represents your creditworthiness based on your credit history. The most widely used scoring model is the FICO score, which ranges from 300 to 850. The higher your score, the better your creditworthiness.

Factors that influence your credit score include:

1. Payment History: Your record of making on-time payments on loans and credit accounts.
2. Credit Utilization: The ratio of your credit card balances to your credit limits.
3. Length of Credit History: How long your credit accounts have been active.
4. Types of Credit: The various types of credit accounts you have, such as credit cards, mortgages, and installment loans.
5. New Credit: The number of recent credit inquiries and newly opened accounts.

Now that you have a better grasp of what constitutes your credit score, let’s explore ways to improve it.

1. Pay Your Bills on Time

Consistently paying your bills on time is one of the most crucial steps in improving your credit score. Set up reminders, automate payments, and establish a budget to ensure you never miss a due date. Payment history carries significant weight in determining your credit score, so make it a priority to be punctual.

2. Reduce Credit Card Balances

High credit card balances relative to your credit limits can negatively impact your credit score. Aim to keep your credit utilization ratio below 30%. Paying down credit card debt can have a swift and positive effect on your score.

3. Avoid Opening Unnecessary Accounts

While having a mix of credit types is beneficial, opening new credit accounts frequently can be detrimental to your credit score. Each credit inquiry can cause a small dip in your score, and opening new accounts may shorten your average account age. Be selective when applying for new credit.

4. Maintain a Diverse Mix of Credit

Having a diverse range of credit types, such as credit cards, installment loans, and mortgages, can demonstrate your ability to manage different financial responsibilities. However, only take on credit you can manage responsibly.

5. Regularly Review Your Credit Report

Obtain free copies of your credit reports from the three major credit bureaus (Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion) annually. Review them for errors, inaccuracies, or fraudulent activity. Disputing and rectifying any mistakes can positively impact your score.

6. Settle Delinquent Accounts

If you have past-due accounts, work to settle them. Negotiate with creditors to establish payment plans or settlements, which can help improve your payment history over time.

There are many tools and apps available to help you monitor and improve your credit score. Be careful about signing up for paid subscriptions – make sure you’re not paying for a service that you can otherwise get for free. Check out resources like Nerd Wallet for reputable apps and credit card programs that may help you build up your credit score.

Improving your credit score takes time and consistent effort, but the long-term financial benefits are well worth it. By following these actionable steps, you can take control of your creditworthiness, open doors to better financial opportunities, and secure a stronger foundation for your future financial endeavors. Remember that improving your credit score is a journey, so stay patient and committed to your financial goals!

In today’s fast-paced world, saving money has become more crucial than ever. Whether you’re striving for financial independence, planning for a big life event, or simply want to create a safety net for the unexpected, developing a habit of saving is a skill that can empower you with greater control over your financial future. In this blog post, we’ll explore a range of actionable tips and strategies that will guide you on your journey to saving more money effectively.

 

1. Set Clear Financial Goals:

Before you embark on your savings journey, it’s important to define your financial goals. Whether it’s creating an emergency fund, saving for a dream vacation, or building a retirement nest egg, having a clear purpose for your savings will provide you with the motivation and direction needed to stay on track. These will likely change over time, so make time to regularly check in on these goals to make sure they still work for your current needs and vision for your future.

 

2. Create a Realistic Budget:

A budget is your financial roadmap. List your sources of income, all of your regular expenses, your annual and/or quarterly expenses, and anticipated irregular expenses (e.g. a vet visit for your pet, a broken windshield for your car, etc.). This will help you identify areas where you feel you can cut back so you can allocate funds towards your savings goals. Keep track of your actual spending versus your anticipated budget regularly (weekly is a great idea so it doesn’t become a huge chore), and be kind to yourself if things look a little wonky. It’s not a failure, just an opportunity to evaluate and commit to creating new habits.

 

Verde’s Recommendation of Thirds for Budget Management

⅓ Necessities: Your necessities are your groceries, housing (including taxes), and transportation (car payments, gas, insurance, etc) and should not exceed ⅓ of your income. 

⅓ Wants: The other ⅓ should be spent on your wants – entertainment, dining out, toys, etc. 

⅓ Savings: That leaves you ⅓ of your income that you can save!  

While this is a great rule of thumb, we also know that this may not be what your current financial situation allows for – that’s okay.  You can grow towards this goal by using the 5 / 10 / __ method.

 

3. Automate Savings:

Automation is your secret weapon to effortlessly increase your savings. Set up automatic transfers from your checking account to a dedicated savings, retirement, or investment account each month. This way, you won’t have to rely solely on willpower to save consistently.

 

4. Reduce Unnecessary Expenses:

Trimming unnecessary expenses can significantly boost your savings potential. Consider cutting down on eating out, subscription services, and impulse purchases. Small changes in your daily spending habits can lead to substantial savings over time. At times we understand this can be easier said than done! Changing your spending habits and behaviors takes time, patience with yourself, and the energy and willpower to create a new process. Remember, these changes aren’t a “loss” in the short term – they are a gain for your long term success!

 

5. Shop Smart:

When shopping, always look for discounts, coupons, and sales. You can make this process more efficient and less time consuming by leveraging apps for stores you shop at regularly; these apps let you digitally add coupons and savings to your rewards or frequent shopper’s card so you don’t have to carry around a load of paper coupons.  You can also use tools to compare prices of items you’re contemplating purchasing across multiple online and brick & mortar stores. Also, consider buying generic brands instead of name brands, and explore thrift stores, consignment shops, or online marketplaces for second-hand items. 

 

6. Cook at Home:

Eating out can be expensive, and the cost of restaurant meals can quickly add up. Cooking at home not only saves money but also allows you to make healthier choices. Plan your meals, buy groceries in bulk, and prepare meals in advance to minimize food waste. Check out a presentation by Michelle Kopp, with Hope Financial, to learn more about cost cutting ideas around this topic in her presentation “Is Your Food Eating You?” from August 16, 2023.

 

7. Negotiate and Comparison Shop:

Don’t be afraid to negotiate when making significant purchases. Many retailers are open to price negotiations, especially if you’re a loyal customer. Additionally, always compare prices and options before making a purchase to ensure you’re getting the best deal.

 

8. Limit Credit Card Usage:

While credit cards offer convenience, they can also lead to overspending and debt if not used strategically. Try to pay off your credit card balance in full each month to avoid interest charges. Consider using cash or a debit card for your everyday expenses to stay within your budget.

 

9. Generate Additional Income:

Explore opportunities to earn extra income, such as freelancing, part-time jobs, or selling items you no longer need. Investing your time in a side hustle can provide a significant boost to your savings.

 

10. Be Mindful of Impulse Buying:

Practice mindful spending by giving yourself a cooling-off period before making non-essential purchases. Ask yourself if the item is a want or a need, and whether it aligns with your financial goals.

 

Saving money is a skill that requires dedication, discipline, and a clear plan. By setting achievable goals, creating a budget, automating your savings, and making conscious spending decisions, you can build a strong financial foundation for yourself and your loved ones. Remember, every small step you take towards saving more money brings you closer to financial security and the ability to pursue your dreams with confidence. Contact a Verde Advisor to start or improve your savings journey!

In the hustle and bustle of modern life, it’s easy to lose sight of our financial goals and find ourselves overspending on things that seem harmless at first glance. One area where this is all too common is our food expenses. From grabbing takeout on busy weeknights to indulging in brunches and coffees on weekends, the money we unknowingly funnel into our food habits can quickly add up, leaving us wondering where all our hard-earned money went.

Financial stability and responsible spending don’t mean giving up the joys of dining out or treating yourself to your favorite meals. Instead, it’s about finding a balance that aligns with your financial goals and values.

Check out this webinar with Financial Coach, Michelle Kopp, CPA, of Hope Financial and Financial Advisor, Tommi Harris as they talk about discovering practical solutions to regain control over your finances, specifically targeting overspending on food.

Here you will learn three key elements to effective budgeting and walk away with actionable steps to start saving immediately.

At Verde Capital, our Financial Advisors work closely with you to develop a plan for evaluating your tax plan, monitor income fluctuations, and maximize savings rates for your goals. We focus on creating an optimal asset location strategy for you and your family to minimize your lifetime tax liability. Our Financial Advisors partner with our clients to create comprehensive financial plans that help them navigate through life’s financial situations – both near-term and far into the future.

Additionally, Certified Public Accountants work with you on the day-to-day aspects of your tax plan. They create an easy-to-use guide, prioritize what’s important for you to focus on, and customize a list of items to keep track of for deductions. All of these, combined with personalized coaching around better planning habits, can help reduce short-term money stress come tax time.

If you’re interested in learning more, click on the video above to listen to the conversation between Tommi Harris, a Financial Advisor with Verde Capital Management, and Teresa Lindberg, CPA, with ImpAcct LLC, as they discuss cash management, budgeting, and how a financial coach can help improve your financial wellness.

 

I get this question all the time, and there have been numerous books written on the subject. Warren Buffett, with a net worth of nearly $100 billion, is one of the most successful investors in history. While many authors have tried to explain his tactics and strategies, I think they miss the two greatest lessons Buffet can teach us.

 

The first lesson is time. Buffett started investing at the age of 11, and has stuck with it for over 81 years. 

• At 14 he had an investment portfolio of around $5,000, which he doubled to $10,000 by age 19. 
• At 28, he bought his current home for $31,500, where he continues to live to this day. 
• By the age of 30 he became a millionaire, and at the age of 55 became a billionaire. 

What Buffet did exceedingly well was learn how much money was enough to live off, and invested the rest over nearly a century. During that time, he never stopped saving, and never exited the stock market. By letting the power of compounding interest work in his favor, he amassed tremendous wealth.  

Which brings me to the second lesson: temperament. Warren has an unwavering conviction that stocks and the market will grow over time. During the last 80 years his steadfast temperament and conviction has been tested numerous times: stagflation in the ‘70s, the fall of the Soviet Union, 9/11, the financial crisis of 2008, and the Covid-19 pandemic. During each of these times, Buffett could have thrown in the towel and said, “the world is too crazy and I should sit this one out,” but he didn’t. Instead, he stayed in the market; this helped him build his fortune. 

So how can we apply these lessons today?  Well first, we need to make a distinction between being rich and being wealthy. Rich is what you can see on the outside, and has almost nothing to do with wealth. Rich is the house, the cars, the expensive jewelry, the clothes, and the Instagram-esque lifestyle some people sink their cash and savings into. 

Wealth is invisible; it’s the value of your company (if you have one), your general and retirement savings, and your stock portfolio. Too many of us spend too much time trying to look rich, and we don’t do the things we need to do to make ourselves truly wealthy. 

What we can learn from Buffett is this: figure out what you need to live on to meet your needs, hobbies, and creature comforts. Then save and invest the rest, and have the conviction in your future goals and dreams to continue to do so even when the world and life events may challenge you to stop.  

Wealth allows you the freedom to do what you want, when you want, with who you want for as long as you want. This is the ultimate freedom, and it’s priceless.

Source: Forbes Profile: https://www.forbes.com/profile/warren-buffett/?sh=10f468564639

Verde Capital Management, Inc. is a federally registered investment adviser. The information, statements and opinions expressed in this material are provided for general information only, are based on data we believe to be accurate at the time of writing, and are subject to change without notice. This material does not take into account your particular investment objectives, financial situation or needs, is not intended as a recommendation to purchase or sell any security, and is not intended as individual or specific advice. Investing involves risk and possible loss of principal capital. Diversification does not ensure a profit or protect against a loss. Past performance is not indicative of future returns. Advisory services are only offered to clients or prospective clients where Verde Capital Management, Inc.  and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. No advice may be rendered by Verde Capital Management, Inc. unless a client service agreement is in place.

The start of 2022 has been a challenging one for investors.  In the month of January, stocks were down 5.3% with some areas such as the Nasdaq losing nearly 9%.1 This comes amid a wall of worry related to the surging Omicron variant, inflation fears, and anxiety related to the Federal Reserve’s desire to increase interest rates.  While it’s certainly plausible these fears could derail the U.S. economy, history suggests these fears may be overblown.  Consider in the last five years a stock market investor would have more than doubled their money, despite multiple pullbacks along the way.2  Pullbacks are market drops that tend to be less than 20% and often correct themselves in less than 12 months.3  In that time, we’ve dealt with Brexit, the possible collapse of the Eurozone, the government shutdown of 2018, multiple impeachments scares with former president Donald Trump, the North Korean missile crisis, and a global pandemic, unlike anything we’ve seen since 1918.  Despite all these challenges, the U.S. economy grew by 5.5% last year, which is the best growth rate since 1984.4

These pullbacks can cause a lot of anxiety along the way, but hindsight shows us overreacting to them would have led to suboptimal results.  Investor selling during pullbacks is the main reason research has consistently shown over long periods of time that stocks earn an average of 10%, while the average investor makes just 2.3%.5 This atrociously bad number, comes down to fear, which can completely paralyze us at the worst possible time, leading us to sell our investments when we should be holding and/or buying.  This is not to say we should never play defense; in fact, while pullbacks cannot be avoided, market crashes are the real enemy and most investors would be wise to adjust their portfolios to soften the blow.  Market crashes (like the financial crisis) can take years to hit bottom, typically wipe out nearly half an investor’s money, and could take a decade to recover from.6  How does one know the difference?  Simply put, market crashes tend to correlate to recessions.  Over the past 50 years, there has been an 83% correlation between a market crash and a recession, while pullbacks have only shown a 38% correlation.7 

If we can understand when a recession is coming, we might be able to prepare for a market crash.  With an economy posting some of the best growth numbers in 40 years, and most leading economic indicators pointing to an expansion, the probability of recession is low.8  And while investing never affords us the luxury of absolute certainty, we can confidently say the latest market volatility is a pullback, not a market crash.  Investors would be wise to temper their anxiety and not overreact to the current volatility.  Just like it did in the past, we believe the current downtrend is temporary and will likely correct itself later this year.

 

Source: VCM’s Recession Risk Update – February 2022

 

Source: 1,2, 4 & 6 yCharts.com

Source: 5 Dalbar – Average Investor Return

Source: 3,7 & 8 Anatomy of a Recession – Clearbridge Investments

 

Verde Capital Management, Inc. is a federally registered investment adviser. The information, statements and opinions expressed in this material are provided for general information only, are based on data we believe to be accurate at the time of writing, and are subject to change without notice. This material does not take into account your particular investment objectives, financial situation or needs, is not intended as a recommendation to purchase or sell any security, and is not intended as individual or specific advice. Investing involves risk and possible loss of principal capital. Diversification does not ensure a profit or protect against a loss. Past performance is not indicative of future returns. Advisory services are only offered to clients or prospective clients where Verde Capital Management, Inc.  and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. No advice may be rendered by Verde Capital Management, Inc. unless a client service agreement is in place.

What a year!  I don’t know about you, but it feels like 2020 and 2021 merged into one loooong year.  Anyone else feeling like we all need a month long vacation in a beach hut or a peaceful forest cabin?  What would that Federal legislation be called?  Relax America?  Vacations to Support Mental Health?  (Insert sarcasm here… although I fully support everyone taking a vacation in 2022… go, start checking out dream lodging on Airbnb!).

 

9!

 

Despite the exhaustion many of us have experienced, and are experiencing from the last two years, let’s talk about ways to tee up 2022 for a less tiring year.  At least financially speaking.  Pull on your “Adulting” hat, grab your fav beverage and note taking paraphernalia.  Deep breath, and…

 

8!

 

Here we go!  Now is a great time to review your spending habits.  Wait, what did you just mutter under your breath?  You’d rather binge watch holiday movies on The Hallmark Channel?  Nope, we’re gonna do this and get you ready BEFORE New Year’s Eve for your mandatory financial health resolution. (You can toast your awesomeness on NYE with a glass of bubbly knowing you already thoughtfully prepared your financial goals for 2022.  Go on with yo’ bad self!). 

 

7!

 

If you have an app like Mint, or a spending tool on your banking platform, brace yourself and take a peek.  Be honest with yourself.  Are you comfortable with your spending habits, or did your stomach twist up and you visibly cringe over the results?  Regardless of which knee jerk reaction you had, take a deep breath and jot some notes down (honest ones… these are just for you, so don’t sugar coat them).  

 

6!

 

Now, take a sip of your fav beverage, and check in on your savings.  Look at your balances and performance in your retirement account.  Do you have an HSA or FSA?  Take a peek at those if you do.  Have an emergency fund? (Most people don’t, so no judgment either way).  Do you have enough in that fund to live off of for a month or three?  Lastly, check out your toilet paper stock… did you over buy during the Great Toilet Paper Shortage of 2020 and still have some left over?  (This has nothing to do with finances, I’m just curious to see if the memes from last year were accurate, lol).

 

5!

 

Take a sec to breathe, you’re doing great!  So… did you open an investment account to invest in meme stocks or dip your toe into options trading?  Or did you already have an investment account?  Buy some crypto on Venmo or in your Coinbase wallet?  If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, I bet you can guess what I’m going to say… yup, log in and check out your performance!  Are you happy, shoulder shruggingly okay, or did your head hit the table when you dropped it in disgust?  Don’t worry, I’ve got some good advice for you, just keep reading and doing.  You’ve got this!

 

4! 

 

Brace yourself.  It’s time to check out your debt (if you just screamed at the screen because you wanted to skip this part… I feel you, I’ve been there too).  It’s like ripping off a band-aid, just do it!  List out your credit card debts, your student loans, car loans, mortgage, home equity loans, all of them.  Done?  If you don’t feel overwhelmed right now, I’m sincerely proud of you and applaud your hard work to reduce or eliminate your debt!  If you feel scared, depressed, or anxious about your debt level, that’s okay too… just don’t allow yourself to get stuck in these emotions.  We’ve got work to do.

 

3!

 

So now we have a full view of your financial puzzle.  Good news is the pieces to this puzzle are interchangeable, so if you don’t like what you see, we can change that.  How?  Well, not through get rich quick schemes, multi level marketing, or finding that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  It’s going to take time, dedication, and some good ol’ fashioned honesty.  There’s no fast fix to finances. 

 

Love the picture you built?  Go ahead and do a happy dance!  Celebrate!  Then sit down and keep reading.

 

2!

 

Here’s where you write down everything you love and hate about your current financial situation.  And I do mean everything.  Hate your tax bill?  Want an emergency fund?  Student loans feel insurmountable?  Want better performance in your 401(k)?  Happy with your savings level?  Write it down.  

 

Then write down goals for yourself for every item.  Don’t leave any out.  

 

1! 

 

So now what?  There are a multitude of options.  First, go talk to your financial advisor and show them everything you just worked out.  Don’t have a financial advisor?  Hire one… like the savvy advisors at Verde Capital.  Or at your local bank or credit union.  Or an interactive app.  Believe me, it helps to have an objective supporter in your corner when it comes to your finances (just don’t buy or sign up for any products!).  

 

Second, post those notes in a spot where you can see them.  Hold yourself accountable so you can work towards a better financial future in 2022.  Are you going to meet all your goals in 2022?  No, but you’ll make progress if you stick to it and remember that financial health is like physical health: both take regular hard work to maintain and improve!  

 

Third, set rewards for yourself when you accomplish goals.  Nothing extravagant, but something that makes you happy nonetheless.  List those out next to your goals where you posted them on your fridge.

 

Fourth, schedule time to measure how you’re doing EVERY WEEK!  Don’t wait for a month to check on your spending, debt, savings, or meme stock performance.  Check in every week and make notes.  Be honest.  What can you do the following week to work towards your goal?  It doesn’t need to be huge, in fact it should be a small, realistic step.  

 

Fifth, don’t be too hard on yourself if reaching your specific financial security and wellness goals takes longer than you originally planned.  That’s life my friend.  Just keep working towards your goals, keep your head up, and keep moving forward.

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

From everyone at Verde Capital Management, we wish you a wonderful, safe, and bountiful 2022!

The holidays are a time for creating memories, celebrating the joys of family and friends, enjoying delicious food, and buying thousands of dollars of gifts… (insert record scratch here)… wait, that last part isn’t right!  

 

It seems the holidays are quickly becoming a reason to buy and this year is no exception.  Large retailers have been pushing consumers to purchase holiday gifts since September due to supply chain challenges, leading some to purchase gifts often and early.  I’m not sure if these challenges have worsened or improved at the time of publication since this article was written in early November.  Regardless, let’s review some ideas for those of you who may have left your holiday purchasing until now.

 

First, the holidays are more than just buying the perfect gift for a loved one.  Sure, everyone adores a beautifully wrapped package, its contents selected with love.  However, no one wants their loved one going into debt for months or years to come.  If you haven’t already, make sure you set a budget for your holiday spending and STICK TO IT!  

 

Second, when building your budget make sure to include everyone: family members, friends, co-workers (ahem, your delightful presence is gift enough), your children’s teachers, caregivers, etc.  Then evaluate if you can give the gift of time instead of a gift purchased with your hard earned money.  Be creative and sincere, and don’t give a gift of time if you’re not really interested in spending time with that person.  

 

Third, gift cards are great budget-friendly gift options.  Crafting a well written note to accompany these often maligned gifts can make one mean just as much as that fancy coffee mug with cat cartoons printed all over it that’s sitting in your Amazon cart (hit “delete” don’t “save for later”).

 

Fourth, try shopping locally.  There are some amazing artisans, and organizations in your area with an abundance of beautiful gift options.  While I appreciate the speed and convenience of shopping on my phone with large retailers, I truly enjoy selecting unique presents from a local vendor.  You can also check out websites like Etsy (just be sure to check on shipping costs before you buy!).

 

Fifth, if you’ve already completed your shopping for the season and are currently wondering how to dig out from under the mountain of brown cardboard boxes and shopping bags (and are avoiding looking at your credit card bill), have no fear.  You can still return unwrapped and unused gifts if necessary.  If that’s not an option, sit down with a plate of holiday cookies or your fav snack, and take a good hard look at what you spent.  Now is a good time to create a plan to pay off any accumulated holiday debt, and evaluate what your budget should be for next year.  

 

At the end of the day, make sure you spend time with those you love this holiday season – the memories you’ll create with them are more important than any gift you can purchase!

 

Verde Capital Management, Inc. is a federally registered investment adviser. The information, statements and opinions expressed in this material are provided for general information only, are based on data we believe to be accurate at the time of writing, and are subject to change without notice. This material does not take into account your particular investment objectives, financial situation or needs, is not intended as a recommendation to purchase or sell any security, and is not intended as individual or specific advice. Investing involves risk and possible loss of principal capital. Diversification does not ensure a profit or protect against a loss. Past performance is not indicative of future returns. Advisory services are only offered to clients or prospective clients where Verde Capital Management, Inc.  and its representatives are properly licensed or exempt from licensure. No advice may be rendered by Verde Capital Management, Inc. unless a client service agreement is in place.

What does love mean to you?  Is it the sweet smile and bright eyes of a joyful baby looking up at you as they take their first steps?  Is it the small hand of a child clutched in yours as you explore the world?  Is it the hug of a friend that fills you with comfort, or the laughter of the same friend as you crack up reminiscing about shenanigans long since past?  Or the gentle caress of a lover in the early morning light?  The breaking of bread with family and friends celebrating a milestone, holiday, or achievement?  The quiet beauty of sitting next to the love of your life just being and enjoying a sunset?  Or caring for a parent who can no longer do so for themselves without help?

 

All of these moments may define love to you.  Or just some.  Or none that I’ve listed here because let’s be honest, love is measureless and boundless and I would have to write for the rest of my life to even come close to identifying even a small measure of moments that may define love for each of us.  Love is a concept that has challenged philosophers, poets, writers, scientists, and humans for time immemorial.  

 

This post isn’t going to attempt to define love, or reveal a novel approach on how to find it, or how to keep it.  This is a blog meant to encourage quiet reflection regarding love’s worst enemy.  Time.

 

Who do you love?  Love comes in many forms and isn’t regulated to just romantic relationships.  I love my boyfriend, my family, my dogs, my friends, my coworkers (no, I didn’t get paid to add that bit), and many more.  

 

Who do you feel loved by?  I’m gonna personally ditto that last list (yes, I just referenced Patrick Swayze’s famous line from the movie “Ghost”). 

 

How do you love?  Is it through deeds and actions performed to honor and support your loved ones?  Is it through providing for their needs and wants via hard work, frugality, and planning?  Is it through teaching lessons learned and wisdom gained through your journeys?  Is it through just spending cherished moments with them and creating memories to last when distance separates you?  Is it through generosity shown with creature comforts or momentous gifts?  All of these ways of showing love are genuine and wonderful, so don’t go judging which is best.  

 

However, we can all probably do better at expressing our love to those we love, especially when we lose focus in the midst of the hustle and bustle of our everyday lives.  I encourage you to take the time to show your love however suits you, and them, best.  Be spontaneous or plan it out – just be sincere and don’t eat a ton of onions and garlic before doing so (even good friends don’t want to smell dragon breath from across the table!).

 

When do you love?  I hope your answer is every moment of every day.  That’s not a mushy gushy statement either.  In the back of my mind I remind myself I work every day to provide for my family.  I cook food regularly to feed their tummies and to bring joy.  I craft or select gifts to celebrate or “just because”!  I make time to just catch up and be present.  I support my parents by shouldering burdens and facing their challenges with them.  I’m not great at all of these most days, but I strive to be (heck, besides the work and cooking sometimes I feel I’m terrible at the rest).  

 

Why do we love?  I’ll leave that question to be answered by the philosophers and poets much wiser than I.  One common thread amongst them all: just remember to say it, share it, express it, and honor it in all of its many forms as often as possible.  We never know how much time we have with those we love, so make every moment count. 

 

“Ghost” (1990)

 

Molly: Do you love me, Sam?

Sam: What do you think?

Molly: Why don’t you ever say it?

Sam: What do you mean? I say it all the time.

Molly: You say ‘ditto’ and that’s not the same.

Sam: People say ‘I love you’ all the time, and it doesn’t mean anything.

Molly: Sometimes you need to hear it.  I need to hear it.